Texas Dogs Are Smart

Take care of any widow who has no one else to care for her. But if she has children or grandchildren, their first responsibility is to show godliness at home and repay their parents by taking care of them. This is something that pleases God.
1 Timothy 5:3-4 NLT

My mother had hip replacement surgery in August. She lives alone. Well except for her dog and although my brother and sister live somewhat nearby, I volunteered to stay with her during the beginning of her recuperation since they weren't able to stay with her 24/7. My brother runs his own business and my sister works full-time and takes care of her young son and newish husband.

I grew up in Texas but haven't lived there in years. May I describe the August temperatures as "stinking hot?" 100s during the day and maybe dipping into the 80s or 90s overnight. I stayed for three weeks and it rained briefly one time. Ack!

I sweat like I had never sweat before.

It was not pretty.

***********

I arrived on a Saturday while Mom was still in the hospital. My brother picked me up from the airport and we went to visit her briefly before we went to her home. Upon arrival, we let Blondie outside and I read over the one full page of dog instructions which began with taking her for a walk each morning around 6:30 a.m.

Doesn't Blondie look like an angel?

Well she is not!

I read my mom's instructions very carefully about how Blondie knows her walking route and the next morning off we went: Blondie in her harness, me holding her leash and being oh so responsible. I had poop bags at the ready.

My mom lives by a lake which is the lowest point of the neighborhood. Blondie and I spent the beginning of the walk going uphill. She had a lot of enthusiasm being out for a jaunt and I was already sweating like a piggy and probably looking a bit purply too.

We went all the way to the top of the neighborhood, walked down an alley type street, wove our way down toward my mom's street and then....instead of taking a left turn toward home, Blondie turned right.

We walked to the end of the road that dead-ends at a locked metal gate which separates my mom's neighborhood from the neighborhood on the other side. Blondie looked longingly through the gate which had a huge lock on it and I thought, "What the heck?"

I was starting to catch on that something was amiss by this point so instead of wasting brain-power on how to pick the lock and go through that area, I tugged at her leash and turned her around where we wove our way back toward home.

********

A few hours later, my brother arrived with our mom and after getting her settled upstairs, I questioned her about the one hour walk I'd taken (?) Blondie on in the morning.

My mom look startled and said, "What? One hour?"

And then she started laughing.

Yes, that dog had "taken me for a ride." Her walks are usually 30 minutes tops.

Don't ever let anyone tell you that dogs are dumb.

They are actually smarter than some people.

Well....at least one person.

Have you ever been outsmarted by an animal?

Some Things

never change.

I wanted to take a video of our granddaughter walking.

You'd think I'd learn that kids don't "perform" just how we want them to...

Did you notice that she starts by crawling then goes into "walk mode?"

She is a blessing and makes me laugh!

Free entertainment people!

An Ordinary Tuesday

I arrived to work early, read my devotional and was waiting for 8:28, when an SUV pulled into the parking lot. I heard a woman's voice say, "We'll ask this lady," then I saw her and maybe a six year old boy walking toward me.

She had a piece of paper in her hand and I asked, "Are you looking for CHOP?" (Children's Hospital of Philadelphia)

She looked surprised and said, "Yes. How did you know?"

I told her that the GPS directs people here all the time and then gave her my standard directions, "Make a right out of the parking lot. At the light, made a left. Go down 6 lights and make a left."

She started to repeat it back to me incorrectly so I said, "No," and repeated the directions which she then understood.

She said, "Thank you. You are an angel!" She looked down to her son and said, "That lady is an angel!"

As she walked away I said, "You're welcome and good luck!"

I said a prayer as they left the parking lot asking for God's guidance to CHOP and His healing for her son. I gave Him thanks for my being in the parking lot to assist them with directions and thanked Him for the blessing of being called an angel on an ordinary Tuesday morning.

Yet what started out as ordinary for me became extraordinary. I don't think I've ever been called an angel. And thinking about the mother being lost, probably running close to the appointment time, worried about her son's health, I'm sure she would have said it was not an ordinary Tuesday morning for her either.

Because I can remember 25 years ago, driving our son to Children's Hospital in Washington, DC for doctor's appointments and surgeries. I remember the nurse carrying our son to surgery and him smiling at us over her shoulder. I remember sitting in a waiting room filled with anxious parents and sometimes when their doctor arrived, he would lead them away to tell them that their child had died.

When I begin to think that my day is ordinary, God shows me that it isn't and I'm surrounded by others who aren't living ordinary days either.

What's the nicest name you've been called lately?

An Empty Nest

Our daughter is moving has moved into her first home with her husband and daughter. They are starting with bare essentials and although we've been storing a hand-me-down sofa from one of my co-workers in our basement,  she decided that she wanted the two dressers from her old bedroom too.

Who knew that an empty nest means that it's not only "kids" moving out....but furniture too?

The words "Empty Nest" take on a whole new meaning!

(This Public Service Announcement is for future Empty Nesters.
You'll thank me one day :)

Is an empty nest in your future or are you living it now?

Having A Baby

Our daughter is having a baby. She went to her ultrasound appointment thinking that she would find out if she was having a boy or a girl. The technician told her that the baby was in the worst possible position to determine the gender....tushy down and curled up in a ball.

I am sorry she was disappointed yet I had to laugh since this is only the first of many times that the child will not cooperate with her wishes. Darn kids! Ha!

Oh and while I've always tried to be careful about how much of my adult kids' lives I share....let me say that it will be "open season" on the grandkid.

Grandma is counting down to November Sweet Baby and I am limbering up my fingers in anticipation for some great blogging material!

No pressure. :)

Update: Our daughter had another ultrasound and found out she is having a girl!

What I've Learned Lately

We drove to West Chester to help our daughter move out of the apartment she left one and a half months ago.

I started thinking about how when we helped her move in to her campus apartment, I had placed my hope in the college and town.

She would study hard, succeed in her classes, in this new chapter of her life.

I had placed my hope in a place, a situation.

Then she flunked out of her third semester there. Moved to a different apartment. Worked long hours for little pay. Quit the job and moved back to our area leaving a lot of her "non-essential items" behind.

It was time to load them up.

While her life has been changing, I realized that this was her present, not her entire future.

She is living out a portion of her life and from my parental perspective (although difficult to watch) I love her, pray for her, and am here when she needs me.

I take comfort that God is with her too.

He is a loving Father who knows what is best for her.

He knows her past, present, and future.

I have learned that life is sometimes messy.

I have learned to not place my hope in a place or situation.

I have learned to place my hope in the Lord,
He is here and through His discipline and love,
all will be well.

And I have learned that living life with our daughter will never be boring.

(The next day she came and with help from her boyfriend and her wonderful dad stored all the non-essentials in the basement.)

A happy ending to the move.

(Thank you Daughter for giving me permission to publish this post.)

This is My Life

We hired a painter to come and paint all the ceiling surfaces in our home. He did a walk-thru last week, we talked high ceilings, nail pops that need repair, white flat paint, and later that night he called with the price and said, "plus the cost of the paint."

OK. The deal was struck and I've been looking forward to his arrival for a week.

He showed up Thursday and began unloading his various ladders and drop cloths. His plan was to work until noon so after introducing him to our daughter, I left for work.

My commute is 20 minutes and half way there my cell phone starts ringing. It's our daughter and she says, "Mom, he wants to know where you put the paint."

What?

I told her to hand him the phone and said, "I don't have any paint. When you said the price plus the cost of the paint, I assumed that you would buy the paint and I would reimburse you for it."

Wrong.

Now the plan is for the painter to show up on Friday.

With paint.

Yes. This is my life.

It seems that I live it so that others can learn from it.

Here is the lesson: Don't assume a painter will arrive with paint.

I know I won't.

Oh and by the way, should I assume he's a bit passive-aggressive?

I arrived home and this is what greeted me in my foyer.

How far does it go up you ask?

And is it a coincidence that he left it in front of the half bathroom? I think not.

Good thing I am not superstitious, because if I were I would predict that I will have a lot of bad luck in my future!

Sometimes I have to laugh to keep from crying. Will you join me?

Typical Day

I had two errands to accomplish on Friday.
First, get a flu shot.
Second, buy a birthday present for our one year old great nephew, Brady.

My friend Terri gave me a great gift idea for Brady. A Melissa and Doug puzzle. Handmade, very sturdy and after checking online, I discovered they were in stock at my local Toys R Us store.

Off I went to my 10:00 a.m. flu shot appointment. I walked in to my doctors' office, checked in and went and sat down for what I was thinking would be a short wait. Ten minutes later, I was called back, got my shot and left.

I drove to Toys R Us. A smidge over 10 miles away and started thinking that I didn't know how many years it had been since I'd shopped in the store. I remember a time when I felt like I "almost lived at Toys R Us" and then our kids "outgrew the toy part of life." (That's also when the gifts got a lot more expensive too.)

I took a shopping cart and found a cute card for Brady. Then I started wandering around looking for an Apple to Apple game I wanted for our family and of course a Melissa and Doug Puzzle for Brady.

Right away I determined that Toys R Us had too much visual stimulation for me. I started thinking that the place could drive me to drink. I looked in the aisle that had board games, saw the sign that said they were in alphabetical order and then wondered in what classroom they learned what alphabetical order meant? The shelf started with "C" and next to Candyland was Monolopy. YIKES!

I gave up (for the moment) and went in search of puzzles. Not only did I find the aisle with a sign that said "Puzzles" but underneath that lovely word was "Melissa and Doug Puzzles." Hooray! I found two puzzles for Brady and was sorting through them to find the most pristine conditioned ones when a woman and a toddler came into my line of vision. I apologized for sorting through and stacking the puzzles along the shelf and she turned to me and said, "Were you just at a doctor's office?"

I'm sure my face registered my confusion....and after a pause....I said, "Yes." Then she said, "I thought I recognized your green shirt."

Note to self: If I want to go unnoticed, I shouldn't wear lime green.

Second thing to ponder: A young mom (with a toddler) has sharper mind recall than me.

Thirdly: It really is a small world when we ended up over 10 miles away and saw each other again.

Lastly: My arm hurts from my flu shot, but I accomplished buying our great nephew's gifts for his first birthday.

My purchase at Toys R Us: Puzzles for Brady, gift bag and birthday card with a big "1" on it, and Apples to Apples for my family. Thanks Terri for the great gift idea!

Happy First Birthday Brady!



Do you have a toy store experience you'd like to share?

Home Improvement/Garage Trim

After years of watching the trim around our garage doors rot, we hired someone to replace the rotten old wood with....plastic! Ta-Da!

I love the low maintenance spirit of the PVC (polyvinyl chloride) product! And was thinking about suggesting replacing much of the inside of our home with it until I Googled it and saw that there are those who don't recommend it being used in classrooms because of toxicity issues. So I'll stick with the garage trim only.

Isn't it pretty?

Partial Definition of Me

I learned an interesting lesson about myself while I was in Virginia with our son. An observation that surprised me and disappointed me too.

After placing my order at Starbucks for a
Venti,
Iced,
Skinny,
Vanilla latte,
Triple shot,
6 pump
beverage,
the barista said, "Don't forget your receipt. And by the way, did you know that if you come back after 2:00 today...."

Then I interrupted him.

I said, "That's ok. I'm heading to Pennsylvania in a little while so I won't be in the area after 2:00."
He said, "Oh, that's ok because the offer is good at any participating Starbucks."
"Oh...thank you for telling me then."

I picked up my drink and then went to settle into a soft leathery-type chair where I thought about what had just happened. I've always prided myself on having good manners and using common sense especially with servers (after all they prepare my drinks/food).

But instead of letting the barista just finish saying another sentence, or two tops....I was rude and cut him off.

I didn't even have the (bad) excuse of being in a hurry. I knew I was going to be sitting there for at least and hour waiting for our son to finish his interview and come and pick me up.

There wasn't a big line behind me. No people waiting impatiently while the barista was sticking to his closing script.

It was just me.
Being rude.
Now ashamed.

I can't take back that moment, yet will try to live more gently and courteously in the moments to come.

Have you had a similar experience lately?

After posting this, I read Karen Ehman's post called "Dead-heading". She's one of my favorite Proverbs 31 Ministries women whose blog I read all the time. I think it's time to "dead-head" my rudeness, then let God's Word bring gentleness and  good manners "to bloom."

Balance

Have you ever had a walking washing machine? Well, I do.

On some laundry loads, it doesn't walk. On most laundry loads though, it will either walk to the right and butt up against the laundry sink (which is attached to the wall) or it will walk backwards toward the wall and toward all the hoses, plug, etc.

It walks while on the spin cycle which happens twice per load. Sometimes it stays still for the first spin cycle, then walks through the second. Sometimes it stays still for the second spin cycle, after walking during the first. Then sometimes it will walk during both spin cycles.

Oh joy.

Which brings me to what I was thinking about today while holding on to my washing machine during a spin cycle. (Were you wondering when I might get around to it? lol)

My dislike of the word "balance."

Besides the obvious wish that my washing machine could keep its balance, I've never bought into the thought that I can lead "a balanced life."

Years ago, when I was working (and my kids were in elementary school) I worked part time. My day began getting them on the bus for school, chores before leaving to work from 10:00 a.m.-2:00 p.m. Rush home before they got off the bus, oversee homework, prepare dinner, clean up, get them settled for the night, then start all over again the next day.

Exhausting!

Then when my kids were in high school. They'd catch the bus, I'd go to work, they'd get home before me. I would walk in and my son would ask, "What's for dinner?" (I gave him a rule that when I walk in the door from work, don't ask what's for dinner before greeting me and asking me how my day was...or else.)

Years ago (while living in Texas) I heard Mary Kay Ash's slogan for the first time, "God first, family second, career third." By modeling their lives with this slogan, women in her company (Mary Kay Cosmetics) could keep their lives in balance.

Really? Am I the only woman that while I was at work, I worried about my kids or what needed to get done at home? While at home, I worried about work?

What kind of balance is that? Not much, in my case. My heart and mind were anxiously thinking about the other place where I wasn't physically located at that moment.

I agree with Mary Kay's slogan, "God first, family second (husband, then children), and career third." Yet some days I am more like a juggler than a person gracefully balanced on a high wire.

I won't put pressure on myself trying to attain a balanced life. Because life and responsibilities change constantly, and being a juggler is a more realistic goal.

Do you hope for or live a balanced life?

Struggling with Technology

Every once in a while I think I have some small part of technology figured out. Then WHAM!

I've lost my techno-mojo again.

I sit at the dinner table and tell my family that I am considered a techno-guru by my Bible Study buddies. After all, I type up the prayer requests in a Word document and attach it to a weekly email distribution list. I also learned how to work the DVD player and the TV at the church for our class.

My family and I laugh about my being a techno-guru because they know my techno-struggles!

I've learned how to post an online job application and attach a resume, cover letter, and college transcript. I would say I look great "on paper" but since now everything is online, I guess I look great "on monitor"....Hmmmm.

My latest challenge has been with leaving comments on other people's blogs. Sometimes it's very easy for me and I get a bit proud. I even figured out how to link a particular post on my blog to their blog. So it makes it super easy for someone to click on my link and voila...it takes them to my post on my blog. Thank you MckLinky and the easy to follow instructions. (If I can do it....anyone can!)

Then comes today when Mary from Giving Up On Perfect asked the question about something funny that was read online lately. I type up my comment, link it to the person's funny post and hit publish. After it's published I hit the link to make sure it works flawlessly....and then....you guessed it....it doesn't work!

Since I don't have an edit option, I typed up another comment with an "easier link," apologized for the first link, hit publish....and then....wait for it....IT DOESN'T WORK EITHER!

Picture my annoyance at this point. Should I write another comment apologizing again? Should I start banging my head on my keyboard? Should I stop talking out loud to myself at this point?

I gave up. I sent an email to Mary apologizing and said that I must have been hit with an idiot stick this morning.

I don't think I have a problem with pride because once I start feeling a wee bit proud of myself and my techno-skills, I once again realize that I have none. Arrrrrrgggggggg!

Do you struggle with technology?

A Birthday Memory

My "baby sister" turned 40 years old this week. I think it's so cool that she is 40!

Our mom told me that my sis gets super emotional every year. Our dad's birthday was six days after hers. She cries about missing our dad (who died in 1992) yet my mom wonders if it also stems from her being upset about getting another year older.

The only time I was upset about my birthday was when my Wonderful Husband didn't buy me anything for my 25th birthday (many years ago). We had gone to visit his parents in Pennsylvania (we lived in Maryland). I went to lunch with his mom and two sisters. One of his sisters asked what he had given me for my birthday. I said, "Nothing."

I was expecting him to go out while I was gone to get me something (a card, maybe a gift, maybe a cake). Because four years into our marriage, I believed that he could read my mind.

On the way home from lunch, we passed quite a few yard sales and his sister started teasing me that maybe he would hit a yard sale for my gift.

Awkward! For me. Because I was already upset and didn't have much of a sense of humor at that point. (I know it's hard to believe because I pride myself on my GREAT sense of humor)!

I also felt I had hit a major milestone (25 years...a quarter of a century). I laugh now (many years later) since this was early in our marriage, pre-parenthood, not much life experience, etc. But when we arrived back to his parent's house after lunch, I was expecting something.

Nope. Nothing.

Finally my bitchy attitude made an impression on him and we had a "tiff" in the privacy of the guest bedroom. He told me I was too materialistic and ended up stomping out for a card and flowers. Happy Birthday To Me. I was angry and hurt yet I know we both learned from that experience.

And the lessons learned have been carried forward through the next 23 years of marriage. (For you math-y readers, we've been married 27 years and counting as of today).

We've both learned how to communicate better and more effectively. Gone are the days of my pouting, him asking what's wrong, me being huffy and saying, "Nothing." Now I wouldn't act so junior high school-ish. I should have pulled him aside and told him that I would like a card and for him to recognize that my birthday isn't only important to me but to show me that my birthday is important to him too. Hey if I hadn't been born, how could he appreciate the years of marital bliss? lol

We've learned that we can't read each other's minds. Ok. This is probably a lesson that I needed to learn more than him. He will freely admit that he's never been able to read my mind! It's not fair of me to assume he knows what I'm thinking, feeling, or what is important to me if I don't tell him.

We've learned to apologize when we hurt one another's feelings. Not a back-handed type of apology...like, "I'm sorry but..." then going on about how I'm right and he's wrong. But an apology that says, "I'm sorry I hurt your feelings." Period. No excuse tacked on to the end. No justifying my side. Just a sincere sentence with a hug included.

We've learned how to forgive each other. I personally don't believe in the saying, "Forgive and forget."  Anytime my feelings have been major league hurt by anyone, I can forgive yet don't forget. The difference is that I remember and learn from the situation. I don't remember in order to throw it back at him/them during the next disagreement or the next. It is in the past. It is forgiven.

For those wondering... my Wonderful Husband has never let my birthday pass without a card again.

Hallmark should be thanking me because I am kind of old!

Do you have some thoughts to share about relationships/marriage?

Valentine's Day

Years ago, I realized that Wonderful Husband couldn't read my mind and I think he was thankful that I finally came to that conclusion. We successfully navigate through holidays (like Valentine's Day) as well as years of sharing a bathroom, raising children, and have learned to communicate effectively through our life.

I am a low maintenance woman (man is he lucky! Ha!). I don't need a lot of money spent on me or things given to me in order to feel loved or appreciated. I like to think that I have a good sense of humor. I'm able to laugh at myself. I'm not mean-spirited because I don't believe that it's humorous to make a joke at someone else's expense. Our 27 years of marriage have been blessed with more good times than bad.

Yet years ago I remember telling him that I didn't like funny Valentine's cards. I do like to laugh, yet cards making fun of how clean our house is or how bad a driver I am were not hitting my funny bone. I like Valentine's cards to tell me that I am loved and if asked, he'd marry me all over again. We share a good life, not a perfect one.

I also like flowers. Don't get me wrong, roses are not my friends. They die too quickly and most don't bloom...their heads just droop after a few days in my care. (Good thing I had better luck raising our children than I do keeping plants alive!) So Wonderful Husband knows he can buy a loose arrangement of flowers at the grocery store and arrange them in a vase we have at home.

For years I have received a loving card and flowers from Wonderful Husband and I'm never disappointed. In fact, I'm always thankful. I am loved. I am appreciated.

My gift to him is also a card expressing my appreciation and love for his presence in my life. I'll cook a nice dinner and toast some heart-shaped bread to "decorate his plate." The flowers will be on the table and our good life continues.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Do you have a Valentine's Day tradition?

Wherever I am...

After years of pondering where society is going with technology, I read a quote by the late missionary Jim Elliot who said, "Wherever you are, be all there." I take it to mean to be in the moment.

People answer their cell phones in restaurants and have conversations at their tables. Women (especially in my town) drive along with cell phones held to their ears. I've been to family parties and watched the younger generation send and receive text messages while having conversations with others.

Email flies across the internet and no one is ever incommunicado. I remember waiting an hour before checking my email at work, so I could accomplish some tasks before getting bogged down with more work and needing to reply to people.

I receive phone calls from people, while they're in the middle of making soup or while they have a TV or radio blaring in the background and they're not focused on our conversation. And they are the ones who called me!

I am as guilty as the others already mentioned. Not so much with technology but with thinking about where I need to go next or what errands need to happen in what order during a conversation with someone. When my kids were small and "big yakkers," my mind would travel elsewhere.

Now I am committed to wherever I am, to be all there.

Will you join me?

Walking Toward Independence

22+ years ago, our son was born in Maryland. He has since graduated from university and is looking for his first full-time job in his chosen profession of teaching.

He composed his resume, received letters of recommendation, copied his transcript and Praxis scores, and filled out online applications. He received a by-invitation-only request to interview at a job fair for Fairfax County (Virginia) School District.

Since it was on a Saturday we decided to make it a road trip for our son's "parental units" too. So all plans were set.

As I saw his stress level increase in the week leading up to the interview, I told him that this was a win/win situation for him. It was his first interview for a teaching position and if he didn't get the job, he could chalk it up to a valuable learning experience (win).....if he did get a job offer (in the future) with the school district (win).

We left home at 6:00 a.m., saw very little traffic and headed south to Virginia. The trip took 3.5 hours and we arrived well before his check-in time of 10:30 for his 11-11:30 interview. We dropped him off at 10:30 and watched him walk away in his suit and tie with his portfolio under his arm.

My husband and I marveled at another amazing moment in parenthood. Our son was making another step toward independence. Walking away from us and toward his future. Wow.

Around noon he called us to pick him up and when we pulled up, he looked at us and smiled. The interview went well. Different than he had expected, yet he was happy with himself. The recruiter said that he might receive a call in June when they have a list of secondary ed. math openings.

In the meantime, he'll be looking for teaching opportunities closer to our home and in the end, he agreed that the first interview was a win/win.

Prayer Quilt Ministry

My church has a Prayer Quilt Ministry. This is something I heard about recently and am grateful for the discovery. (I had heard of Prayer Shawls before and had received a Prayer Scarf from my mother's Prayer Group after I had surgery in 2008.)

Our nephew Gregory died on December 8, 2009. My Bible Study Buddies had been praying for Gregory and his family throughout his illness and when I told them of his death, one of the ladies asked if his wife Becky would benefit from a Prayer Quilt.

One of the quilters (Carol)attends the Bible Study and said that she would begin working on it. She asked me for color suggestions and pattern suggestions.

Carol chose the fabric and pieced the front together. Small strings were attached to the quilt so that after praying, a person would tie a knot on one of the strings.

Dot inserted the batting and attached the back of the quilt. She always pieces in a cross in the upper right corner of the back of the quilt.

Carol finished the edging and attached a label which says the name of our church, the recipient's name and that prayers were prayed over the quilt.

Then the physical quilt is completed.

The quilt was made available for people to pray over. My Bible Study Buddies prayed for Becky to feel God's presence, strength and comfort during her time of mourning. The quilt was also available after both worship services for people to pray for Becky too.

This past Friday, my daughter and I took lunch and the Prayer Quilt over to Becky. I had typed up some information about the Prayer Quilt Ministry for her. I have found that when I have a lot of information to impart that in the "emotion of the moment" I tend to not be able to effectively communicate everything that I want or need to say so I am thankful that I had the envelope to leave with Becky.

What I have learned is that a Prayer Quilt is more than just a blanket. It is visible and tangible evidence of faith. Faith in God, faith in love, and faith in prayer. It is not only a blessing to the person receiving the Prayer Quilt, it's also a blessing to the people creating it, a blessing to the people praying over it, and a blessing to those delivering it.

I feel God's comfort in thinking that Becky is able to literally cover herself in prayers. That over the years the quilt will become more soft and she can enfold herself in prayers.

I thank God for Carol and Dot and for their gifts of quilting, faith, and healing in the Prayer Quilt Ministry!

Do you have a Prayer Quilt Ministry at your church?