Do you remember this song from 1996 sung by Alanis Morissette? I laughed when I heard its release years ago with some of the lyrics including:
"A traffic jam when you're already late,
A no-smoking sign on your cigarette break,
It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife,
It's meeting the man of my dreams,
And then meeting his beautiful wife,
And isn't it ironic...don't you think,
A little too ironic...and, yeah, I really do think..."
Now my life seems to have taken an ironic turn, and although I still like the song, I'm not laughing about it too much today.
During a Mission Committee meeting I volunteered to get information about any liability issues that our church might have before a group sets out for a Southwest Mission Trip.
The next day (we'll say it was Tuesday, March 9) I called the church's Business Administrator at 3:45 p.m. and asked the question. He told me that it was too late for him to call that day and he would be in the next day but gone on Thursday and Friday.
Cue thinking music.... Me: Really? 3:45 is too late to call a place of business? I thought most insurance companies would be open at least until 5:00.
So....I didn't hear from him on Wednesday and of course I knew he was out of the office on Thursday and Friday.
One week later (we'll say Tuesday, March 16) I sent an email "reminding" him of my question and asking for the answer.
Cue thinking music....Me: This is sooooooo typical. I've had this experience with him before. Heavy sigh.
Cue crickets chirping.........
One week later (we'll say Tuesday, March 23) I pick up the phone and call him. Imagine my most polite-est voice. I start the conversation with the reminder that I asked this question two weeks ago and did he have an answer for me?
His reply is that same question came up at the Session meeting last night. Then he goes silent.
I asked, "Do you want to call me back with the answer?" I have no clue what he's doing.
"No," he says, "I'm making a note."
Then, "I probably won't get to this today because I've got a lot of work about the new construction."
Are you ready for this??? Wait for it.....
Then he says, "I'm working in chronological order and my day is pretty full."
Blood pressure is rising....is there music for that I wonder?
But God stopped me from saying, "SO YOU'RE WORKING OVER TWO WEEKS BEHIND?????"
Thank you God for stopping me. Our God is an awesome God! (<-- Hey that's another song that's great! lol ;)
He finished his "note to self" and I asked if he wanted my phone number or if he wanted to look it up. He asked, "Have you moved from...read off my phone number?" And I replied, "No, not moving."
We said goodbye.
Here is where the irony comes in to play.
He has a job
I can't find one.
"Isn't it ironic? Don't you think......"
Note to readers: I claim no liability for the sarcasm dripping off your monitor and onto your keyboard today. May your day be irony-free.
Update: One week later, on March 30, sent an email subject line said, "Still waiting." This is week 3. He emailed back to say that he has a call in to a broker with this question (and others) and he is waiting too.
Update 2: One week later, on April 6, called pastor and gave timeline. This is week 4. The Business Administrator is out of the office until Thursday, yet I should have information by next Mission meeting on April 12.
Update 3: Heard from Business Administrator on Friday, April 9. He was going to assign work to me. Oh, I don't think so. He had questions to ask and I gave him the names to contact. He had excuses for not having an answer yet...and do I need to say it...no apology for his delay.
Final Update: Stopped by the BA's office this morning (April 15) and said it had been 5 weeks and 2 days since I asked my question. He told me that it was taking so long because of "your sketchy information." I reacted poorly...."MY sketchy information?" He said yes and one week was Holy Week and the next week he was out of the office almost the entire week.
I did the math for him, "So 2 minus 5 equals 3 weeks." I'd had it. Told him to call when he had the answer and stalked out.
Happy Ending: I received an email (still April 15) with the answer at 5:15 p.m. I wrote back thank you and I would include the information in the April Mission Committee Minutes.
Final Thought: I will not ask him a question ever again. I would rather live in ignorance than deal with his incompetence. Lesson learned.